Fun is life.::. Hunting jokes

:: Total Jokes: 64

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Hunting jokes::

A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, "when did you bag him?"

The host said, "that was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife."

"Whats he stuffed with," asked the visiting hunter.

"My wife."

Hunting jokes::

Two Canadian hunters were driving through the country to go bear hunting. They came upon a fork in the road where a sign read "BEAR LEFT" so they went home.

Hunting jokes::

Some men go on a hunting trip and separate into pairs. That evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone toting a 12 point buck. "Wheres George?" one of the men asked, noticing that Sam had returned alone."

He is about 6 miles back. He tripped and broke his ankle. I left him there cause I figured aint nobody bout to steal him."

Hunting jokes::

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her.

In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a hilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."

Hunting jokes::

A small village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders sent a message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to come and kill the beast.

For several nights the hunter lay in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give him its hide.

Draping the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture to wait for the lion.

In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks coming from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion.

"What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief.

"Forget the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?"

Hunting jokes::

Commissioned by a zoo to bring them some baboons, the big game hunter devised a novel scheme to trap them - his only requirements being a sack, a gun, and a particularly vicious and bad tempered dog.

Once in the jungle he explained to his assistant, "Ill climb this tree and shake the branches; if there are any baboons up there, they will fall to the ground - and the dogs will bite their tail and immobilise them so that you can pick them up quite safely and put them in the sack."

"But what do I need the gun for?" asked the assistant.

"If I should fall out of the tree by mistake, shoot the dog."

Hunting jokes::

Two guys were out hunting, but they werent getting any ducks. "What do you think the problem is?" one man asked his companion.

"I dunno," came the reply, "Maybe we arent throwing the dog up high enough."

Hunting jokes::

The big game hunter was showing his friends his hunting trophies. Drawing their attention to a lion skin rug on the floor he said, "I shot this fellow in Africa. Didnt want to kill such a magnificent beast, of course, but it was either him or me."

"Well," said a guest, "he certainly makes a much better rug than you would!"

Hunting jokes::

A Cowboy was going deer hunting.. His blonde wife said she was going with him.. That they never did anything together.. So, they went.. He put her in a stand by herself..

Later in the morning he heard her shoot.. He went over to her stand and she was pointing her rifle at a guy with a cowboy hat on..

The guy was telling her, Mamm, you can have the deer you shot.. I just want to take my saddle off of him!

Hunting jokes::

Q: What is the best way to hunt bear ?

A: With your clothes off.

:: Total Jokes: 64

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